Intercultural connections of all kinds (race, ethnicity, nationality, religion) happen at two levels – in public, and in private. Most research focuses on the former, but there is much to be gained by studying the latter. People who have intercultural friends have to discuss and face their differences, and find a way to manage them, and this is even more true for intercultural couples and families, who often are making a longer term commitment to an Other. There is a growing literature addressing the topic.
A few relevant sources follow.
Breger, R., & Hill, R. (Eds.). (1998). Cross-cultural marriage: Identity and choice. Oxford, UK: Berg.
Bystydzienski, J. (2011). Intercultural couples: Crossing boundaries, negotiating difference. New York NY: New York University Press.
Dervin, F. (2013). Do intercultural couples “see culture everywhere”? Case studies from couples who share a lingua franca in Finland and Hong Kong. Civilisations, 62, 1–15.
Gonçalves, K. (2013). Conversations of intercultural couples. Berlin, Germany: Akademie Verlag.
Inman, A. G., Altman, A., Kaduvettoor‐Davidson, A. N. J. U., Carr, A., & Walker, J. A. (2011). Cultural intersections: A qualitative inquiry into the experience of Asian Indian–White interracial couples. Family Process, 50(2), 248-266.
Johnson, E. D. (2020). Say I’m dead: A family memoir of race, secrets and love. Chicago, IL: Lawrence Hill Books.
Karris, T., & Killian, K. (Eds.). (2009). Intercultural couples: Exploring diversity in intimate relationships. London, UK: Routledge.
Lee, Pei-Wen. (2006). Bridging cultures: Understanding the construction of relational identity in intercultural friendship. Journal of Intercultural Communication Research, 35(1), 3-22.
Leeds-Hurwitz, W. (2002). Wedding as text: Communicating cultural identities through ritual. Mahwah, NJ: Erlbaum.
Leeds-Hurwitz, W. (Ed.). (2005). From generation to generation: Maintaining cultural identity over time. Cresskill, NJ: Hampton Press.
Martinez, L. V., Ting-Toomey, S., & Dorjee, T. (2016). Identity management and relational culture in interfaith marital communication in a United States context: A qualitative study. Journal of Intercultural Communication Research, 45(6), 503-525.
McFadden, J. (2001). Intercultural marriage and family: Beyond the racial divide. The Family Journal, 9(1), 39-42.
Moscato, G., Novara, C., Hombrados-Mendieta, I., Romano, F., & Lavanco, G. (2014). Cultural identification, perceived discrimination and sense of community as predictors of life satisfac- tion among foreign partners of intercultural families in Italy and Spain: A transnational study. International Journal of Intercultural Relations, 40, 22–33.
Piller, I. (2002). Bilingual couples talk: The discursive construction of hybridity. Amsterdam, Netherlands: John Benjamins.
Piller, I. (2007). Cross-cultural communication in intimate relationships. In H. Kotthoff & H. Spencer-Oatey (Eds.), Handbook of intercultural communication (pp. 341–359). Berlin, Germany: Mouton de Gruyter.
Romano, D. (2008). Intercultural marriage: Promises and pitfalls. Nicholas Brealey.
Sandel, T. L. (2015). Brides on sale: Taiwanese cross border marriages in a globalizing Asia. New York: Peter Lang.
Tili, T. R., & Barker, G. G. (2015). Communication in intercultural marriages: Managing cultural differences and conflicts. Southern Communication Journal, 80(3), 189-210.
Wilczek‐Watson, M. (2017). Intercultural intimate relationships. In Y. Y. Kim (Ed.), The international encyclopedia of intercultural communication. New York: Wiley. https://doi.org/10.1002/9781118783665.ieicc0058